DKC Atlas Forum

Seeing DKBB doid not have one, speculate and come up with crazy suggestions! I'll post mine later...

K. Rool's all like, "Yo, Kongs. We are totally like so much better than you guys at barrel racing!", and DK's like, "Naw dawg, we're the better ones!", and Funky's like, "Word."


So they race.

Victory for Jomingo.

Jomingo, that made me laugh. Excruciatingly so, but in a good way.

One day all was peaceful in Kongo Jungle. The Kongs were at the beach. Donkey Kong was chillin', Diddy Kong was showing off for Dixie and Tiny, Funky was surfing as Candy watched him. Lanky was swimming, Cranky was complaining, Wrinkly was doing nothing. Just then Klump marched towards the Beach with an army of Kritters.

Klump: Alright Kongs hand over the crystal coconut
Donkey: What crystal coconut? There are a bunch of crystal coconuts around the island. Go find one.
Klump: We don't want any old crystal coconut, we want Cranky's Crystal Coconut. The one in his cabin
Cranky: Stalkers!

Donkey Kong tried to get out of his chaired to face Klump and his men in combat but then sat back down
Donkey: Hey Diddy handle this will ya.
Diddy: Lanky do me a favor will ya.
Lanky: Chunky old pal handle this bozo.
Tiny: Chunky's not here
Lanky: Then why don't you handle it.
Tiny: Why not get Kiddy to do it.
Dixie: Kiddy's gone off on to his college adventures this year.

While the Kongs argued over who would stop the kremlings Klump came out of Kongo Jungle with a precious looking crystal coconut.

Cranky: Get up you lazy baboons and stop him.
Lanky: It's just a crystal coconut we can get more.
Cranky: This isn't about crystal coconuts. It's about standing up to the kremlings.

Cranky's speech was drowned out by Donkey Kong's snoring. Klump and the kritters kneeled before King K. Rool who exited the King Kruizer to meet his kremlings and took the crystal coconut.

K. Rool: Finally! The Crystal Coconut is mine! I've longed for this day ever since the cartoon. Cranky your children are truthfully pathetic. It's hard to believe that they gave me so much trouble in the past. After I my failed attempt to take over Planet Planteon I was expecting more of a fight but I guess your precious children are all washed up Cranky. Just like you.

Cranky looked as though he was about explode.

K. Rool: I'll tell you what. This was too easy. How about a little game. A series of races. Winner gets the coconut.
Cranky: Fine. I'll play your game K. Rool.

Funky came along.

Funky: Yo croc dude! Bring it on! I never lose at racing man. Oh yeah!

*Flashback shows Funky got seventh place in a Mario Kart Wii tournement*

Funky: That doesn't count! Yo C-Boogie!
Cranky: My name is Cranky you idiot!
Funky: Whatever man. I'm gonna go back to the crib and get some parts and build some Barrel Jets man. So that we can race dude. Oh yeah!
K. Rool: Ha! I bet I'll build better jets for my Kremlings then you dude.
Funky: We'll see my homedog. We'll see.

K. Rool leaves.

Funky: I just wanna give a shoutout to mah boi Swanky. Who right now is kickin' it with a tour around the ghetto man. Oh yeah!
Cranky: Funky half the stuff you say doesn't make any sense at all. So I suggest you shut up and get working on Barrel Jets.
Funky: Aight den C-Boogie! WESTSIDE!
Diddy: WESTSIDE!

And thats how Barrel Blast started. The end.

Word.

Too long, I like Jomingo's better.

I really like yours swoopy, except for the strong DKC TV show relavence. Combine Jomingo's and swoopy's(swoopies?) and that was my fan story.

Jomingo wrote:K. Rool's all like, "Yo, Kongs. We are totally like so much better than you guys at barrel racing!", and DK's like, "Naw dawg, we're the better ones!", and Funky's like, "Word."


So they race.

I can just imagine it now... DK and K.Rool in their pimped up rides racing underground, with Candy in between them to signal to go. The sequel should totally be like this.

I'm not saying this to comepete with Jomingo, but heres my version.

The Kongs are relaxing when the kremlings show up, claiming they could beat the kongs in a race. The Kongs tell them the same thing. Then the kremlings challenge them to a race using the barrel blaster things. They except and thats how Barrel Blast started.

I'm not a good summary but its the story i came up with. Its not to compete, so not rudness or flaming please.

Yes, that is pretty straight-forward... and I just noticed that in Brawl, Diddy's rocketbarrels are considered the same as the vehicles used in Barrel Blast. Not real sure what that adds to the table, but just thought I'd throw it out there.

I like Jomingo's and swoppysalvo's. Especially what Funky says in Jomingo's and the time about the Mario Kart Wii game ("That doesn't count.") and how swoopysalvo's closely relates to the cartoon.

Here's mine:

One day, DK and Diddy were walking in the woods when they come across some fiery, burning barrels.

DK: What the---?

Diddy: They're barrels!

DK: I know THAT, li'l buddy! I was just wondering how we'd use them.

Diddy: Uhhhhh, there's a metal strap. Maybe you put it around your waist?

DK: OK.

He puts it around his waist, patting it all over to make sure it fits.

DK: Hm, nothing I do seems to be wor---AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He took off in a blaze of smoke. Diddy rolf'd. He zoomed by Cranky, who was doing his usual thing in his rocking chair. The blaze of heat woke the old man up and he scrambled out of the chair.

Cranky: WHAT THE HELL?!

Eventually DK was stopped and he told the story. Everyone, even the Kremlings(who for some reason were there without attacking), all thought it was a good idea.

And that's my version of the story.

Mario runs threw a jungle with rockets. He meets an ape. "Here's your-a-rockets MR.Kong-a! Say say to your-a-Grand-a-dad I was here and I-a-want Pauline!" and leaves. "Funky! Heres the rockets!" DK yelled at Funky. "Now we can compete in the DK races!" They all run with the Barrels to the forest (but DK sees a tiki thing and kicks it to the Volcano.). "There he to?" Diddy said when he saw the Kremlings. "Of course, little monkey! We have come here to challenge you to a race for the bannanas!!!". And they get ready and...RACE!

K. Rool: 'dude I pwn u guys at barrel racing rofl'
DK: 'no u don't'
So they held a racing tournament. Winner takes all. Or not. Lanky was there too for some reason. And for the first time ever we saw female Kremlings.

It's kind of weird how I spend my free afternoons writing elaborate fan fictions while using fancy words and whatnot, yet here I don't even put effort in it.

Meh, maybe I will write a fic once with pretty words and all. If I'm bored enough... and actually have played the game.

Wasn't Cranky playable too? xD

Yay, everyone's stories are better and funnier than mine! And yes, Cranky was playable. I know. I own the game now