Any Constructive Comments Requested
Thanks!
Hey All,
Well it is about time I started this project... 3 years overdue. My skills are out of date too, since it's been awhile since I modeled/animated anything. I will be creating various characters, items and level objects. This will be an ongoing project influenced by patience.
Completion Status and Checklist
Second Pass
Spoiler!
0:00 Plain "It was a dark and stormy night..." text could be more like as seen here Looking for font type.
0:10 Redo this shot. Especially the hill the House sits on.
1:00 Diddy should get freaked out after talking instead of during.
1:20 Improve Krusha?
2:10 A little bounce/jostle in the tyre's movement might look good
2:25 Add tongue inside DK's mouth
3:08 2:25 Add tongue inside DK's mouth
Added since first posted:
Dialogue speed: I might just be a slow reader, but it seems as though all of the dialogue text is a bit hard to read through in the time we're given — even just having one more second per line would help a lot, I think.
0:10 Redo this shot. Especially the hill the House sits on.
1:00 Diddy should get freaked out after talking instead of during.
1:20 Improve Krusha?
2:10 A little bounce/jostle in the tyre's movement might look good
2:25 Add tongue inside DK's mouth
3:08 2:25 Add tongue inside DK's mouth
Wake-up scene
- ]d.
- 1:10 DK's right foot and leg (on the left, from our view) look distorted, banana clips through his left leg. ← NEW
- 1:12 Clipping between Cranky's fur and right eyebrow (his right, our left).
- 1:14 (and elsewhere) Tread of tyre is see-through. ← NEW
- 1:15 DK's pupils flicker, tie is partially black, Cranky (and lighting in general) is of draft quality.
- 1:16 DK seems to get his guard up a little too early (his reaction time ought to be a bit slower — half a second, maybe?). ← NEW
- 1:17 Bounding boxes of scene objects are visible, tyre moves on its own, etc...
Added since first posted:
Dialogue speed: I might just be a slow reader, but it seems as though all of the dialogue text is a bit hard to read through in the time we're given — even just having one more second per line would help a lot, I think.
Outside treehouse
- 1:36 DK's rolling pose still looks goofy as anything.
- 1:37 DK's jumping pose looks deformed around the shoulders, and the skin of his ankles clip through the fur.
- 1:38 That dust cloud when DK lands is a bit excessive, completely dominating the view; I think it ought to be much smaller and more subtle — a "nice little touch" rather than an overwhelming spectacle.
- 1:40 The dust particles fall like clumps of dirt, and are sized in such a way, too; perhaps a few small clumps could be part of the effect, but I would think it ought to be mainly just a small cloud of fine dust. What you have here would certainly require that a crater/deformed ground be part of the scene, but I personally don't think that a massive cloud like this is the way to go.
- 1:41 A gentle breeze in the trees would look good here.
- 1:48 The tree trunks are moving in a rather unnatural manner.
Empty banana cave
- 1:49 As has been mentioned, the cone of light coming in should be straight (perhaps continuing at its initial angle, towards the upper-left corner) rather than curved. It'd also look good for the light to fade a little at the top edge. Come to think of it, I might again just be rephrasing what sono said earlier...
- 1:50 Not only does the snake (a Slippa, surely?) move to fast, but it appears to be hovering a foot or so above the ground, and its shadow is being cast on the wrong side (assuming the cave entrance is supposed to be the dominant light source). The snake also needs textures (it it's supposed to look like a normal Slippa), and a slither
animation. Remove this portion of the shot. - 1:52 DK's back legs move/are posed really weirdly.
- 2:00 etc. As awesome as it looks, that confetti-dust is certainly a bit out of place; smaller, plain-shaped, monochromatic particles would be my suggestion.
sonosublime wrote:Looking very nice, my friend!
I have some suggestions for improvement/some issues I noticed:
1. "It was a dark and stormy night..." should fade in.
2. Do not add scene changes (fade in/outs, dissolves, etc), unless the script specifically states so.
3. Take away the second shot of zooming in toward DK sleeping.
4. Make the shots in the treehouse last a little longer. They change so fast, and it's a little jarring.
5. After you zoom toward DK's window, have another shot, showing the stormy jungle outside, and then zoom in toward the cave entrance/banana hoard, before starting the banana hoard scene.
6. Give Diddy eyes.
7. Add the shots with him pacing up and down and panicking to himself, before the Kremlings appear.
8. When the title appears, have the screen start out black, and then have the title fade in (over the black) and slowly move toward the screen. After a few seconds of this, then the clouds and Squawks can appear. This is to give the sequence a little more time for me to fit the music to it.
9. Have DK roll out of bed a bit faster.
10. Reduce the camera shaking and dust cloud when DK lands from his treehouse.
11. The snake moves too fast.
12. When Cranky walks, his arm holds the cane too high. Either reduce the length of the cane, or have Cranky hold onto it at a lower point.
13. DK should turn to face Cranky when he starts talking.
14. Keep the text size of the subtitles consistent. If you need more room, just go on to a second line.
15. Move the animation where DK starts looking angry to right before he says, "I don't know who did this, but whoever they are..." That way, there will be a slight pause in the dialogue to add more emphasis.
16. Every now and then, I notice spelling mistakes and missed letters and apostrophes in the subtitles.
A couple more things:
1. The animation might seem a little bland at the moment, but trust me, once all the music, sounds and dialogue is added in, it will look great.
2. I suggest going with this workflow for a scene:
Do the basic animation, including leaving time for dialogue, etc.
Once the scene is basically finished, go through and refine everything:
- Refine the camera movements. This will make a scene much more dynamic and interesting. Again, make sure you use the Rule of Thirds. Also, something I like to do for a longer shot is have the camera slowly pan to the side (but not by much). The scene itself does not really change, but adding this slight camera movement will make it much more interesting.
- Refine the animations. When someone is talking, every now and then, have them glance off to the side, gesture with their hands, blinking, make the characters look at each other, change facial expressions, etc. Think about idle things you do when you're talking to someone.
Once you've refined the scene, send it to me, and I can add the music and subtitles/dialogue.
DKC Atlas Gallery - See most of the models I created for the project so far.
http://www.dkc-atlas.com/gallery/fanart/cyclone/
DKC Atlas Facebook gallery of my more completed Characters and renders. Thanks Qyzbud.
http://t.co/4mNAbq8B
DKC Box Art Title in 3D - Note I posted in another topic. Will post smaller version when I get the chance.
viewtopic.php?f=26&t=1546
Gnawty
Spoiler!
Cyclone's site is currently down. Previous location of the image above:
Downloadable versions of these clips:
Spoiler!
Walk Cycle
http://www.inspiredvisuals.com/DK/DonkeyKongCountryProject/GwatwyFromBoxArt/GnawtyFromBoxArt(WalkCycleD).avi ← currently unavailable
Turntable
http://www.inspiredvisuals.com/DK/DonkeyKongCountryProject/GwatwyFromBoxArt/GnawtyFromBoxArt(Turntable).avi ← currently unavailable
http://www.inspiredvisuals.com/DK/DonkeyKongCountryProject/GwatwyFromBoxArt/GnawtyFromBoxArt(WalkCycleD).avi ← currently unavailable
Turntable
http://www.inspiredvisuals.com/DK/DonkeyKongCountryProject/GwatwyFromBoxArt/GnawtyFromBoxArt(Turntable).avi ← currently unavailable
Jungle Palms
Spoiler!
Cyclone's site is currently down — previous images:
Butterfly from box art
Spoiler!
Previous location:
Animation (tried to animate to match in-game):
(Download this clip) ← currently unavailable
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